RIYADH, 19 February 2005 — You need a maid and a driver, but you only have one room for servant’s quarters. What to do?

Many Saudi families these days are paying the wedding expenses of their maids and drivers, Asharq Al-Awsat newspaper reported. Some families do this either for fear that the driver and maid might engage in a relationship that goes against Saudi culture and religion. Some families do this because there is not enough space to house both a maid and a driver.

Some families are staging big wedding ceremonies for their drivers and maids similar to their sons’ weddings. The rather unusual circumstances sometimes lead to a little confusion. Nura, a 20-year-old Saudi woman, was happy when her family phoned to tell her a groom was coming to visit the house. She was dreaming of family life with husband and children when the groom arrived, and she learned the groom was a neighbor’s driver asking for the maid’s hand in marriage.

Wafa G. remembers when she received an invitation from a friend to attend the wedding of her Sri Lankan driver and Indonesian maid at a wedding hall. Her friend prepared a huge dinner for the happy couple’s friends and even paid for the bride’s dress. Wafa said the wedding night was great — and it was no different from Saudi weddings she’s attended.

Not all these weddings take place based on servants’ desires to get married. Sometimes there’re forced marriages.

Um Khaled told Asharq Al-Awsat that her need of a driver forced her to put pressure on her Indian driver and Indonesian maid to get married. Despite the repeated pleas from the maid and driver against her decision, Um Khaled managed in the end to make them husband and wife. This marriage did not survive, and after three years the driver divorced the maid and left the country.

Muhammad Al-Yaeesh, a marriage official and mosque Imam, told Asharq Al-Awsat that maids and drivers should never be forced to get married, and such a marriage is invalid.

“Most cases in which maids and drivers are married are based on emotional decisions, and those fail most of the time,” Al-Yaeesh said. “Their marriages sometimes don’t solve problems but create problems instead.”

Right or wrong, the marriage officials still help couples get married.

“We try to facilitate the marriage of maids and drivers based on requests from their sponsors, either through us or through their embassies,” Al-Yaeesh said.

“Personally, I think the disadvantages of these marriages outweigh the advantages, especially if the couples end up having kids. That creates more financial responsibility for maids and drivers who came to this country for one purpose — to make money.”