Divorced woman struggles hard to make ends meet
Published: Mar 11, 2010 00:30 Updated: Mar 11, 2010 00:30
JEDDAH: As a single Saudi mother, 34-year-old Areej Iskandar, has been forced to venture out from the comfort of her home and go out and work. Her story is typical of many young single mothers in the Kingdom.
With two failed marriages behind her and two children — a boy and a girl — to look after, Iskandar’s first job involved working as a sales assistant selling books for SR1,500 a month. With few qualifications, the job was the best she could get. She had enrolled on to a BA program at university but was unable to complete the course because of the difficulties her marriages fell into.
She soon left her job after realizing her employer had lied about how much she was to be paid and found a job as a company secretary, something that her family did not support. She soon left this job due to her boss’ “unethical” treatment.
Life has not been easy for Iskandar. The social stigma of living alone as a single mother has been particularly difficult. Her family has, however, been generally supportive. For instance, when she wanted to rent a home, her father completed the paperwork under his name, as she could not rent under her own name.
Supporting her children and paying SR15,000 in rent a year has been particularly hard. “I paid SR10,000 in rent from my mother’s inheritance. In order to make ends meet I’m often forced to sell some of my mother’s jewelry and my own clothes,” she added.
She would sometimes be helped by philanthropists to pay the rent. Her apartment is bare and she has been unable to completely furnish it. One of the few pieces of appliances she has is an old refrigerator, which she inherited from her mother.
In order to make ends meet she used to cook food, which she would then sell on. “The money I used to make from this is very little but was enough to meet the basic expenses relating to my children’s schooling and medicine for them when they became sick,” she added.
“My daughter used to sometimes ask me why we didn’t have furniture like other normal families. I just used to tell her to pray to God that I get a good job,” she added.
She said she was finally able to buy basic secondhand bedroom furniture for a very cheap price.
In order to help pay for school expenses, Iskandar volunteered to work without pay as a teacher at a private school in order to enroll her two kids for free. Under that agreement she was still obliged to pay other costs such as costs for books and uniforms.
“I finally got an opportunity to better my life and landed a job as a sales agent at a private company for SR3,000 a month. I worked very hard to increase my sales commission at this place,” she said.
“I suffer a lot from people who look down on me working but there are people out there who are sympathetic,” she added.
The recent increase in the costs of living also proved a major challenge to her. In spite of her salary increasing over the years to SR5,000, she is left with very little — SR1,500 is spent on her maid, SR2,000 on her driver and SR2,000 on her apartment. She pays the SR500 that she is shy of and her day-to-day costs, such as groceries and utility bills, through commissions she earns while at work.
The only time Iskandar goes shopping is during the sales. “I cannot save enough money to take my children to amusement parks. It is very painful for a mother to see her children not enjoying normal childhood,” she said, adding that the only rides she can afford are SR10 horse rides on the Corniche.
Her most difficult days came when she was forced to hand over custody of her children to her ex-husband. “I was forced to give up children to my ex-husband because I couldn’t provide them with a descent life. The court granted me custody of my children until they are seven years old,” she added.
When she became divorced, the court ordered her ex-husband to pay half her rent and give her a monthly allowance of SR1,000. “In spite of the fact that he earns over SR60,000 a month, he has only paid the rent once and is not regular in paying me the monthly allowance,” she added.
Comments
ZAHEER SYED NIZAMI
Mar 11, 2010 12:48
Report abuseand ex-wife allowance. Single mother or women should be protected.
SARA
Mar 11, 2010 13:23
Report abuseHow can she afford a maid? Interesting that she refuses to compromise on that aspect.
AAMIR
Mar 11, 2010 13:51
Report abuseMOHAMED ABDULLA
Mar 11, 2010 14:11
Report abuseNICK HARVE
Mar 11, 2010 14:13
Report abuse