Leaving kids in maids’ care: Better safe than sorry

By LAURA BASHRAHEEL | ARAB NEWS

JEDDAH: With many people in the Kingdom living fast-paced, modern lives and women holding down jobs, families are often obliged to leave their children with relatives and even maids. However, the question remains whether maids can be trusted?

According to local newspapers, a three-month-old child, called Mishary, died two months ago after being poisoned by an Indonesian maid. The woman had mixed rat poison and crushed Paracetamol tablets into the child’s milk.

The three-year-old developed a severe rash, and remained in a coma after suffering heart and kidney failure.  Police are still investigating the incident that took place in May. It is unknown whether the maid committed the act in revenge and whether she had been abused.

According to a study released recently by Imam Muhammad bin Saud Islamic University in Riyadh, 40 percent of Saudi working mothers leave their children in the care of their maids, 42 percent leave them with their parents and 18 percent leave them in nurseries or day care centers.

Hana Al-Saeed, a 29-year-old working mother of two, said she has no option but to leave her two children with either her maid or her mother. “I work from eight to three and my husband also works so I have to leave my kids with someone,” she said.

Al-Saeed has thought about quitting her job but said she needs the money to secure her children’s future. “With inflation and fees for private school so high I need this job,” she said.

Fatima Turki, a 32-year-old mother of three, said she read about Mishary in newspapers and feels it is wrong to completely trust maids. “Once my maid was looking after my son who was then three years old. While she was looking after him, he burned his knee with an iron. I can never forget the day when I came home and saw his leg,” she said.

Turki said the maid was ironing some clothes and left the iron next to her son while she took a phone call. “My son held the iron and it fell on his knee. He still has a scar. It was a case of negligence but then he is not her son so why would she worry so much about his well being,” she said.

As a result, Turki left her job and says she prefers spending time with her kids.

Leaving children with maids could be the only solution for working parents. Sadly, some mothers leave their kids with maids even when they are home.

Dareen, a 30-year-old mother of two, said her friend’s three-year-old son doesn’t know how to speak proper Arabic because he spends his entire day with the maid. “He can pronounce Indonesian words better than Arabic. I told my friend it’s unfair on the child, especially since he is about to go to school but she doesn’t listen,” she said.

Dareen said her friend is more worried about looking beautiful and hanging out with friends rather than spending time with her child.

A nursery owner in Jeddah who requested anonymity said some parents leave their children from eight in the morning and don’t pick them up until eight in the evening.

“I opened this nursery to help working mothers and look after their kids while they are away. One divorced woman used to leave her son with us for more than 12 hours. I told her it’s unfair on the child,” she said.

The owner said it is also improper to leave children with maids. “I always say to mothers don’t trust anyone with your kids because they’re not responsible for them. I also tell them not to mistreat maids because they will eventually take revenge by hurting the kids,” she said.

Comments

CAREEMA

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Strongly agree .Never leave your child with your maid even if she been with you for a long time and with surveillance equipment .The upbringing of the child in the first 2 yrs is vital.The caregiver that nurtures a child reflects his character etiquette and intellectual development.

RASHID

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If sevent maids are treated better there will be a chance that you get better quality maids and your children get better quality care. one of my saudi bosses told me an incident while he was staying in canada for his education.They had to go to the canadian authorities who deal with maids. after discussing many thing they asked him about the time allocation for her education. my saudi boss did not undestand it and asked them what is it? The canadian authorities told him do you want her to be a maid life long? she has to be helped to improve herself so that oneday she could be indepedent. This is real islam practised by some non muslims. we should learn from others atleast at some time instead of thinking that we are the best in this world.

EDDY

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you may please take care of your maids, who ultimately take much care about ur children. this world is of give n take. if you do good to others, it will be good for u

NASAR

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I am a father of three,After taking care by wife.Everyday I am woried about my kids being far from them.I called them and speak twice in a day to ensure they are safe and good.Some of they won't have kids but they suffer a lot,some of they have but don't care.I wanted to request to all arab people to stop depending on house maids/House Drivers.Without them it's become nothing at home.Please Stop this attitudes!!!!.Almighty has given a strength and power for women even to look after dozens kids.

ZUBAIR MANGALORE

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If any maid take revenge on kids being mistreated by the parents, then it is obsulately wrong, What is the sin with the kids, they are innocent, The maids should leave the troubling parents to Allah the almighty who only punish them for ill treating of their slaves. Here I would like to request to the both Maid & Parents plz do not disturb the innocent kids & vice versa.
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