The woes of being unwanted
One of the more fascinating reads lies in the classifieds columns of a newspaper. It reflects the values of our times and the things, not always delightful, that we do to each other.
Like selling unwanted gifts. Dozens of people in town receiving things they don’t want and then wanting to make a buck on it. Seeing as how I don’t often find myself at the receiving end of presents or giveaways, it always saddens me that someone’s act of grand thoughtfulness should be dispensed with such crass commerce.
Hello, I got a gift I don’t want, so I am going to make some money on it and sell it. Imagine if you gave someone a gift all wrapped up in shiny paper with a shiny ribbon on it and a shiny card with shiny heartfelt word and a few days later there was Ad no CW357 in Domestic category in the paper and someone was dispatching your gift to the highest bidder.
Pretty stupid you’d feel. Not only is it bad manners, it is insensitive. You don’t like the gift you get then pass it on, wrapped in fresh, shiny paper with fresh, shiny thought ensuring that no trace of it having lain in the top shelf of the cupboard for weeks. Now, this is acceptable conduct because it falls in the recycling category and, who knows, it might find its way back to the original owner somewhere down the line.
But really, the phrase itself is unique, in that you can’t want a gift, you just simply receive it. Consequently, by my powers of deduction, if you cannot want it you can hardly unwant it.
What is breathtaking is that after having mumbled their gratitude and their “oh, just what I wanted,” “how lovvvvvvellly,” such recipients are feverishly doing mental maths....wonder how much we can hock this for?
Then we have these second hand sellers telling us that whatever it is they are selling is “almost new,” “as good as new” and “nearly new.” Now, I am a pretty naive sort of chap and I can fall for any good line but what exactly is almost new? Like being almost pregnant. Either you are or you are not. You can say, well maintained, you can say it is in good condition but how can it be almost new if it isn’t.
Then, you think of the things people want to sell and you ask yourself how did they get into this position in the first place.
An encyclopaedia with the E volume missing. So you’ll never know Etna, Eire, Engine or Ecology. Big gap in your knowledge.
A bicycle with one pedal. Well, thanks very much.
Warm, friendly, cordial, family offers single person accommodation in lovely home, only individual of certain region need apply, no smokers, no visitors, no music, no cooking. Wonder what they’d be like if they were unfriendly and less than cordial.
Air tickets to Malta/Mauritius, Chennai, no longer feel like going, for sale, cheap.
How do you sell international air tickets in your name to someone else. This baffles me completely.
But the ads that go up my nose are those that want people educated from a specific part of the world. They are so mealy mouthed and unctuous and it would be far less ugly if you just said it out straight rather than camouflage the call in transparent academia. Give over, will you?
Similarly, while I can understand people electing to be houseboys and maids in western homes where they will get an indisputably better deal I am at a loss to understand the fascination in the furniture world with things western. Every ad for furniture asks to buy or sell second hand furniture that comes from European or American homes only. Is this some sort of indictment of everyone else’s choice of furniture? I take this very personally. I have a great taste in furniture and I cry myself to sleep at night that no one is interested in it.
Now, that’s what I call unwanted malice....at least unwarranted.
