Q. After the death of her husband, a young woman moved with her 5-year-old son to her maternal aunts’ home, where she was brought up. Who should take care of the child, and for how long can he stay with his mother, particularly if she gets married again?
(Name and address withheld)
A. The child remains with his mother and his expenses are to be paid by his guardian, who in this case should be his grandfather or his paternal uncle, as the case may be. Where the child remains after he becomes independent is subject to his own desire. If he prefers to stay with his mother, then that should be the case. If she gets married, then the person to take care of the child while he is still young is her own mother, i.e. the child’s maternal grandmother, if she is alive. If not, then her late husband’s mother. Such custody belongs to the nearest woman to the child, always preferring the child’s mother’s side. If she gets married and her new husband is willing to take on the upbringing of the child, and his guardian agrees, then that is perfectly appropriate. What we have to understand is that Islam provides certain rules to explain responsibilities. If people agree to take on more than their responsibility, then that is kindness which should be encouraged in Islamic society.
