Many men face great obstacles these days when they want to marry. Some have to borrow from relatives or banks in order to achieve their dreams of leading a married life. These loans of course will become such a nightmare after marriage that the unfortunate men will have to suffer for years.
Ahmad talked about his experience with marriage on the installment plan and the debt he fell into as a result. “My marriage ended in failure,” he said. “Four years ago, I fell in love with my friend’s sister. I asked for her hand in marriage but I had to get a bank loan because of her family’s excessive financial demands. I did not really realize the size of the debt until it was too late. My wife and I had a child and my financial responsibilities began to increase. I discovered that nothing remained from my salary after the bank deducted its monthly payments.”
What is even worse is that my wife did not appreciate what I had done for her. I began to search for another job so that I could earn more money. My life was round-the-clock work. Because of this, my relationship with my wife suffered. She got a divorce and I am still paying off my loan from the bank.”
Samer said, “My marriage life was normal until the day came when I decided to buy a luxurious car on monthly installments. I did not realize what a problem it would be until the first day when I had to pay both the car company and my rent. I saw that paying both would require most of my salary and I began to worry. My journey into debt had begun and that influenced my performance at work and my relationship with my wife.”
Many people think that the easiest way to marriage is to get a bank loan. They do not realize that they put themselves in danger and may face complicated problems in the future. A reasonable girl will not want to marry if it means putting herself in debt. How can she live with the fact that she and her husband will be paying their marriage debt for half their lives?
This is the main reason why few recommend that couples get themselves in debt in order to marry. Couples must be aware that financial responsibilities will grow in the future, especially after they have children. It is not necessary for a couple to build a house before marriage.
Nor is it necessary to pay a great deal for the expenses of marriage; these payments are not a part of Saudi culture. One possible solution is for fathers to help their sons and offer them financial support when the sons want to marry.
- Arab News Features 12 June 2003
