I went shopping with a friend of mine the other day. We landed up in the lingerie section of a famous department store and as we were there anyway, I decided to buy a few things myself. I was looking through the racks with a few undergarments in my hand when I felt a presence behind me. After having felt the weight of someone’s gaze upon me for a while I turned around to glance quickly and there stood a sales assistant grinning in my direction. I immediately immersed myself in the pursuit of finding the correct size highly embarrassed by the fact that I was being scrutinized.
When I emerged with a whole host of mismatched items hoping that the guy would have vamoosed by then, there he was looming larger than life with some small hangers attached to an assortment of satin and silk creations in his hand.
“What size are you looking for?” he asked earnestly trying to help. I stared at him blankly. Did he really expect me to confess the intimate details of something so personal to him? Was I about to reveal to a perfect stranger whom I had never seen in my life a fact that I would never disclose to any man? He misinterpreted my silence as the inability to decide and volunteered his services to start a guessing game.
“Maybe,” he began with definite authority (the gentleman had obviously been doomed to working in the same section for a long time hence his air of omniscience), “you would be this size?” He held up a black lace undergarment as I cringed inwardly and scanned the vicinity for anyone I knew. “This is very nice material,” he proffered in much the same way a proficient car salesman would promote the superiority of Japanese technology. “Isn’t it hot these days?” he began to banter in the most ludicrous manner as I planned my escape.
“Maybe you would prefer something in cotton?” he asked deftly switching the black with a floral green printed number.
“I am fine thank you,” I managed to muster up.
He then stared at what I had accumulated and smiled.
“You know you can find the matching items to those?” he said bending over and sifting through the lower sections picking out the aforesaid with particular flourish.
“Shall I take them to the counter for you?” he grinned, hand eagerly extended in my direction. I felt too embarrassed to dispute his request and sheepishly walked over to the cashier in tow.
There is something borderline pornographic about having a strange man tell you what size you are and then watch as he riffles through your most personal effects searching for a bar code. I stood around feeling violated and really quite sick wondering what thoughts must be going through his head as he processed my purchase.
I have similar issues, albeit nowhere near as pronounced, when I have to buy clothes and cosmetics. When women shop, they require the input of other women, not of a bunch of vague men who don’t even use these products and stand around expounding on the virtues of this creamy new lipstick or waxing lyrical about the qualities of a certain type of lash lengthening mascara.
I just fail to understand how it is that such a scenario can be justified in a country as conservative as ours. It defies all logic to declare that a woman is not allowed to work in an environment geared toward other women. What would be deemed more controversial: Having women selling to other women or thrusting women into the highly embarrassing position of seeking the assistance of men when making their most private purchases?
In a society where more than half of all graduates are women, there is a potential goldmine of Saudi female employees who can do the job very well. What’s more is that I don’t understand why it is that in the retail industry it is forbidden for women to serve alongside men within their own enclosed sections when in other sectors such as hospitals, banking and the media they are allowed to.
If those opposed to such a move toward greater employment integration cite mixing as being a problem then I would like to ask such individuals that if it came to their wives, daughters and mothers having to buy underwear would they not prefer them to be in contact with a woman over such matters than a strange man? Is it not more offensive for a woman to be subjected to this kind of discomfort and humiliation because of such spurious laws?
There really needs to be a lot more done to encourage women’s participation in retailing and opening up employment opportunities for them in this sector. I know that there have been new laws introduced to remedy the situation but as yet, I have not seen them implemented. It really is pathetic that being from Saudi Arabia I am expected to travel to Europe or America to buy my lingerie from other women.
(Lubna Hussain is a Saudi writer. She is based in Riyadh.)
