We do not know the date when Umm Habeebah, or Ramlah bint Abu Sufyan, got married to the Prophet (peace be upon him). Most probably it was when her father had become the chief of Makkah, who carried the responsibility of bringing about the downfall of Prophet Muhammad and the message of Islam. She was in Abyssinia when the marriage took place, while her husband was in Madinah. When her father in Makkah heard of her marriage, he said in reference to the Prophet: “He is a man of honor who brings no shame to anyone.” Nor do we know the date when she traveled to Madinah to join her husband.
Biographies of the Prophet assume that she traveled when the last of those left in Abyssinia returned to Arabia. This was at the beginning of year 7, just when the Battle of Khaybar had finished. To suggest that she returned with this last batch is probably inaccurate, because it is reliably accurate that Negus, the King of Abyssinia, sent her to the Prophet with Shurahbeel ibn Hasanah. We know that this last batch included 16 men, all of whom are mentioned by name. Shurahbeel is not one of them, which gives a strong indication that he returned earlier, accompanying Umm Habeebah.
Her return to Madinah was celebrated by the Muslim community. In fact, Uthman ibn Affan held a banquet in her honor, as he was related to her. His father was the brother of her mother. As he was married to the Prophet’s daughter, he felt the marriage joined together two of his relatives.
Ramlah continued to feel perturbed by the enmity between her father, Abu Sufyan, who led the Makkan unbelievers in their successive attempts to crush Islam. Yet she continued to hope that a change would come about to make her father see the light of Islam. This happened shortly before the Prophet entered Makkah, putting a final end to all aspects of idolatry in the city that has continued ever since to be the focus of all Muslims, wherever they happen to live. In fact, the Prophet made a gesture of honor to Abu Sufyan when he declared himself a believer. The pledge of security extended to the people of Makkah gave Abu Sufyan the privilege of complete safety for his guests. Anyone who was in Abu Sufyan’s home was safe.
In the Prophet’s home, Ramlah conducted herself with complete dignity. Among the Prophet’s other wives, she held her position, unwilling to be led by anyone. Not even Ayesha could impose anything on her. At the same time, she kept herself above the rivalries that might disturb the calmness in the Prophet’s home. Shortly before her death, Ramlah called Ayesha to come over. She said: “There might have been situations between us that could occur between any two wives. May I ask your forgiveness for those.” Ayesha willingly did so. Ramlah said: “May God forgive you and myself whatever might have happened between us.” Ayesha said the same. Ramlah also did the same with Umm Salamah, who also prayed for their mutual forgiveness. To each of them, Ramlah said: “You have pleased me. May God give you abundant pleasure.” Ramlah died in year 44. She has reported 65 Hadiths which are related in the six authentic anthologies of Hadith.
