I had not anticipated writing this article.
Instead, it was decided that I would write something on makeup trends for Eid and the nail polish color of the season. I was going to go on and on about how neutrals and muted mattes are making a comeback and how with Eid being a month shy of autumn, we’re caught in an awkward in-between seasons period. We’re sick of bronzer, yet we can’t help getting darker even as we walk to our cars! Do we jump the boat and pull out fall’s red rouge lipstick or do we stick to summer’s shimmery lip gloss? Oh, the horror!
Well, if you want the answers to these paramount questions, then please stop reading now because you’re not going to find them here.
The truth is, I could write about how in this Eid, kaftans should be what’s sparkling and covered in sequins — not your face — and how the colors of the rainbow shouldn’t be used all at once when it comes to your eye shadow. I could go on about how in the 1980s, it might have been cool, but looking as if you’ve just stolen all of “Jem and the Hologram’s” stage makeup is no longer a good thing.
I could also beg women to stop with the “Mommie Dearest” eyebrows that look so horrible. (I mean, they never really even looked that great on Joan Crawford, but we just accepted them because, well, she was Joan Crawford!)
Nonetheless, all of that is futile because even if you get the right advice here, there isn’t anywhere to go. That’s right, my dear friend, it is “No more beauty for you!”
Salons all over the Middle East are buzzing with gossip that’s been hindered during this Holy month. Women are getting plucked, permed, and pampered by the thousands.
Yet, some women are not so lucky. The women who have been tirelessly rolling sambousaks (stuffed pastries with a savory filling) for the entire month deserve that much-needed manicure, just like the women who have been on their feet night-after-night playing dinner hostess deserve a reflexology foot spa. Unfortunately, however, many of them may not get their entitled pampering.
Why? That’s because every single decent, sanitary salon is now booked up to and throughout this Eid holiday. It seems that getting an appointment for a leg wax during Eid has now become just as difficult — if not harder — as finding an airline reservation to London! Both things require planning weeks in advance. And, if for some reason you miss your appointment, well, good luck! Telling people you’re going for a retro 1960s look isn’t going to justify your furry appearance.
One friend told me she booked her Eid beauty regime three weeks ago upon her return from summer vacation! Even then, available appointments were scarce. The receptionist at the salon even told her when they could fit her in — she was unable to give any preference as to what day or time.
So, I truly believe there is only one thing left to do. Next year, two months prior to Eid, call all the popular salons. Make numerous appointments under different aliases. Once you’ve booked the entire week prior to Eid for all possible beauty treatments, open a Facebook page and start auctioning them off.
See? Wasn’t that better than some generic makeup advice?
