Religion teaches us to be humble in our relations and behavior. Funerals are no exception. Jeddah society, though, has taken a turn for the worse when it comes to women’s funerals. Though Islam does not designate a code of dress for these somber occasions, out of respect people tone down their attire and try to show consideration for the family of the deceased.
The first shock at funerals is the abayas. Glitter, beads, lace and flashy embroidery hem abayas and head scarves from head to toe. Jewelry, trinkets, and lush handbags ornament shoulders and hands, not to mention the fragrant perfumes and brightly manicured nails.
Faces with full make-up and heads, sculpted to perfection with coiffure hairstyles suitable for parties. Funeral make-up has even become an item of menu of services offered at hair salons. All this is bad enough.
Top of the list of horrors is tattooed makeup, especially when it is the face of the widow or mother of the deceased. No matter how much they have cried or how sad they may be, it is baffling to see a woman who has just lost a loved one stuck with a face fully lined and colored with tattooed make-up. Grief and lipstick just do not seem to mix.
Second comes mobile phone ringtones. If you want to hear the top of the Arab charts, go to a Jeddah funeral. Along with roosters, babies chuckling, and the crafty voice that shouts, “You have a MESSAGE!” you cannot be prepared enough for the chimes you will hear in the midst of the dismal setting.
A word of advice, remember to put your phones on silent, unless you have the “good” ulterior intention of taking their minds off their grief with racy ringtones, in which case, I suggest “My Heart Will Go On” by Celine Dion or my personal favorite, Queen’s “Another One Bites the Dust!”
(Hadeel Shaikh is a poet, freelance writer and an advocate of children’s rights. She is based in Jeddah.)