Many men and women who write to me eat excessively because they are unhappy.
Read my study of Susanna who is suddenly finding life very difficult. She is a bright, attractive girl, she is married with two stepchildren, she is a dedicated teacher and she has been trying to start a family of her own. In the past two years she has put on 12 kilos and is unhappy with her weight gain. She says that she eats for comfort and has a difficult relationship with her husband’s ex-wife and children. She recently went for a promotion that she did not get, and to cap it all, she has been trying to have a baby for a year and a half. She blames herself for all of this and eats to compensate.
During our meeting she ate five biscuits so fast that she could not even have tasted them. I explained to her that life is sometimes hard, and at times unfair and out of control. We cannot blame ourselves for everything that happens — we all go through very difficult patches sometimes. She cannot blame herself for not conceiving a child — it is biological.
The difficult relationship with the ex-wife is her husband’s and ex-wife’s history and their failure. The fact that she did not get the job she desired is what happens in life and maybe they had decided even before the interview about who was going to be offered the position.
Bad things happen, but it is our attitude to life that is important. Blaming herself, giving up and eating is not helpful. The inability to conceive looms large for women and it is natural for Susanna to feel so strongly. Overeating will not help, but eating healthily and getting fit will make her feel better and will also improve her chances of conceiving. Learning to relax and feeling less stressed will also help her.
Susanna should also focus on the good things that life has given her — a lovely husband — a beautiful home — a job she enjoys — and a supportive family. She can acknowledge that she has a problem but can still take care of herself and enjoy what she has got.
If you have a problem, talk about it. Take time and decide what you can do about it. If you feel that you have depression, talk to your doctor. Happiness comes from within and from giving to others.
Getting active:
Muscle weight
You’ve been working out and watching what you eat for the past few weeks. but you have gained weight. The fact that you have gained weight shouldn’t worry you, and here’s why. Muscle weighs more than fat, so you cannot rely only on the scales to give you the thumbs up or down on your weight loss and fitness success. The scales only tell your weight, not what makes up that weight. Since you’re working out, you are developing muscle so you may gain a kilo or so. For a light workout that doesn’t build muscle, you can e-mail for my Mini-Morning Workout at [email protected].
Recipe of the week
Steamed whitefish fillets
Serves 6
Ingredients
1 kg whitefish fillets
360 ml tomato juice
1-1/2 tsp oregano
1/2 tsp seasoned salt, or to taste
1/2 tsp white pepper, or to taste
Method
Preheat oven to 200°C. Place fillets in a baking dish. Combine tomato juice and seasonings in a bowl. Pour over fish. Cover and bake 12-18 minutes, until fish flakes easily.
Ask Alva
I am a 40-year-old man. I have stopped taking direct sugar, except one spoon in coffee in the morning. Still my sugar levels are between 120 — 130 in the mornings (after fasting). Two hours after eating, it is around 220 — 230. Is there any exercise to control such high levels, how we can split our food intake, or use of alternatives such as Fruit Sugar. I am afraid of using Aspartame due to possible side effects. — Bala
From the little that you tell me, it sounds as though you might have diabetes. Your fasting blood sugar is normal if it’s 70 milligrams per deciliter (mg/dL) to 100 mg/dL. You should therefore consult a doctor as soon as possible.