RIYADH, 14 January 2007 — Attitudes toward working women in the Kingdom are changing. Nonetheless, some working women find it difficult to balance the demands of their careers and the needs of their husbands and families. This is especially the case with women married to men who are unsympathetic to them working.
Speaking to various career women, it does seem that the husbands and male guardians of many do not take seriously the jobs that many women do.
Working woman Abeer Abdul Aziz says that the biggest stress that women experience comes from their husbands. “Husbands are of two kinds: They are either understanding and therefore do not demand their wives to be totally perfect in everything. However, these types are the minority. The majority demand perfection in everything. They wait for every mistake and will even concoct them if none is forthcoming. These husbands demand particular types of food, dress and more housecleaning and child care,” she explained.
Abeer says that such husbands point out their wives’ mistakes in order to make them feel guilty. She wondered why husbands were so demanding of their wives especially since working women do carry out a number of household chores. “I think male guardians should stand by their women and support them rather than adding to their stress,” she said.
Fauzia Al-Yami is a single working woman who says she does not face any problems from her family. “I believe married women are the ones who face problems. They are forced to balance between their work and their families and are asked to tolerate their husband’s sometimes unreasonable demands,” she said.
Munira Nadir feels that women have proven themselves to be more patient and tolerant than men. “Women are able to tolerate the stresses that they face at work and at home while men can’t even discharge their own responsibilities,” she said.
Some single Saudi women have also experienced difficulties from their families. Sara Idrees is a student who is working as well. She says her family initially did not want her to work, thinking she would not be able to study properly. Nevertheless, after some insisting, she managed to convince them. “I don’t get to see my family during the week because of my busy schedule,” she said.
Tagreed Al-Barak is another student who is also working and studying. She said that initially her family did not want her to work in a mixed-sex environment. “They do not respect female jobs. I’ve had a lot of training courses and I want to be an outstanding figure in society. But my family stands as an obstacle between me and my career. They want me to leave my job because they say they can’t provide me with transportation.”
Nura Al-Sulaiman lives with her mother, stepfather and siblings. Having experienced problems at home, Nura said she found a job as a way to escape home. “My stepfather is very harsh with me. He doesn’t understand the fact that a woman can also work. But he is unemployed himself and so agreed to let me work. I told him that I would be paying for the household expenses and so he agreed,” she said.
Nura said that she has to cook and clean when she returns home. “I don’t have any rest. I do the cleaning, laundry and cooking. I then go to bed and start another tough day,” she said. “Nevertheless, he tells me every now and then that he won’t allow me to work. These are routine expressions that he says the moment he sees me resting or putting some work aside. My mother is usually out. She visits neighbors and friends in an attempt to escape the sad reality of her life.”
