Q. I would like to ask if it is permissible to change one’s name. I am thinking of such a change by which I drop my middle name, indicated here by the letter A, and by which I am known to all. The reason is that I have suffered from weakness and lack of stamina, and I think that my middle name has something to do with it. Since it will be very difficult to change all official records, if I were to change my name totally, I am thinking of only dropping my middle name, except in official documents, and using my first name, Muhammad. Please advise.
Muhammad A.A.
A. To change one’s name, which may be unsuitable or may have negative associations, is certainly permissible. The Prophet changed the names of a number of his companions on their acceptance of Islam, for valid reasons. But you will not be changing your name; you will only be using your first name instead of the second. This is perfectly permissible.
However, I need to explain to you two things. The first is that a name does not cause the sort of problems you have mentioned. These are the results of some other factors, which a psychologist or behavior therapist may be able to identify. Such factors may have roots going back to your childhood, or your upbringing. This, however, requires long-term treatment.
The other thing you need to look at is your self-esteem. This may be the root cause of your problem. If you have low self-esteem, you could have all the symptoms you have mentioned and many more. Again, this cannot be sorted out by name change. You will probably need help with that, which could be offered by a trusted, reliable, caring and broad-minded friend or relative, or by a professional person.
The first may be preferable, as he would be eager to help, not one who expects a fee. If you write to me again, indicating your e-mail, I may be able to give you some further advice.