The Prophet was keen to establish relations between individual Muslims on the right footing, which is a brotherhood that unites them all in faith and in their service of the Divine cause. But to him, this was a first step. He was also keen to refine this relationship so that it is strengthened by all sorts of good manners that are brought into play. Hence, the Prophet pointed out to his companions, and all his followers in later generations, different aspects of behavior that have a strong bearing on enhancing their relations. Such aspects were of different types, with some commendable ones which they should do, and others which they should avoid. Both commitment of the first type and avoidance of the second are meant to promote better relations in Muslim society.
Mujahid reports: “It is discouraged for a person to stir pointedly at his brother, or follow him with his eye when he leaves, or ask him where he has come from and to where he is going.” (Related by Al-Bukhari in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad)
What we have here is an indication of certain things that may cause a person some embarrassment, particularly if he is of the shy type. When one gazes pointedly at his brother, or a woman does this with another woman, or when they keep looking at them after they have departed, this may be a source of embarrassment. It is as if one is questioning the other, or indicating that there is something wrong either with his appearance or behavior or attitude. Hence, anything that is exaggerated and could cause embarrassment should not be done so as to keep the brotherly relation free of anything that may cast on it a blemish.
This Hadith suggests that one should not ask his brother where he was or where he is going. But this is shown here as a sort of interfering with one’s private business. The context of the Hadith suggests that. Otherwise we are commanded by the Prophet to inquire after our brethren and make sure that they are all right. When the questions asked show our care for them, then these are perfectly appropriate. But when they sound as an attempt to pry into someone else’s affairs, then they are certainly discouraged. An important factor of distinction between the two types is how the person questioned perceives such questions. It is he who may feel embarrassed or irritated, and it is to spare him such irritation or embarrassment that the Hadith is intended.
We can imagine that this Hadith is intended to protect a rather sensitive person from what causes him something that is not particularly welcome. However, sometimes we need to express our own irritation or point out the singularity of some idea or behavior. A threatening word may be acceptable on such occasions. Anas reports that the Prophet saw a man driving a she-camel and told him to ride it, but the man said, “It is a she-camel”. The Prophet repeated his advice twice more, and each time the man gave him the same answer. After the third time, the Prophet said: “Ride it, or else.” (Related by Al-Bukhari, Muslim, Al-Nassaie, Al-Tirmithi Ahmad and Ibn Majah).
Perhaps we need to point out here that one explanation of this Hadith suggests that the camel was one of those that Arabs used to pledge for their idols or for other purposes. These animals would then be left unused for any purpose, such as riding, carrying or farm work. Islam put an end to all such idolatrous practices. This explanation makes it clear that the Prophet’s order was meant to counter the unwarranted practice. This is best done by using the animal for the purpose the pagans did not intend it to be used for. Hence, the Prophet told the man to ride it. When the man was not ready to comply, the Prophet warned him. In the Arabic original, the warning word the Prophet uses is stronger than “or else”, but a literal translation would make it too strong. It would give a wrong impression about the Prophet’s language. Needless to say, if the camel was one of those pledged for idolatrous practices, then respecting these by refusing to ride the camel would have placed the man in a position that is unacceptable to Islam. Thus, he might incur God’s displeasure and that would be very serious indeed.
A different explanation is that the Prophet was merely giving the man a piece of advice. It is very important to act on the Prophet’s advice in any situation. Hence, the man should not have repeated the same objection three times. Having done so, he was risking being in a position of disobedience to the Prophet. That is again very serious.
Another Hadith mentions that a man asked Ibn Abbas: “I have eaten bread and meat; should I perform ablutions?” Ibn Abbas said: “How singular! Do you need to have a fresh ablution for eating wholesome food?” (Related by Al-Bukhari in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad).
This Hadith is grouped with the previous one only because of the words of disapproval used in them. The first was a stronger one, because the man did not comply with the Prophet’s order despite its being repeated three times. This one carries, in its Arabic equivalent, a friendly element despite its expression of strong disapproval.
Ibn Abbas was a highly learned companion and cousin of the Prophet. As such, he is well-placed to express disapproval, particularly when the matter concerns a religious practice. Ablutions are performed in preparation for prayer and other religious practices. But when one has performed ablutions, he remains in a state of purity, ready to pray, until he has invalidated his ablutions by urination, wind discharge or defecation. But this man did nothing of that. He only ate some wholesome food. Hence, Ibn Abbas was amazed that he was asking whether he should renew his ablutions. This he expresses in a rhetoric question: “How singular! Do you need to have a fresh ablution for eating wholesome food?” The very thought is strange indeed.