RIYADH, 4 April 2004 — So many expatriate workers in the Gulf carry the pressure of being separated from their families, while at home wives and children struggle on alone.

The enormous employment opportunities for both skilled and unskilled labor in the Gulf countries lure large numbers of people from all over the world. Barring professional categories, almost all of these immigrant employees have single status iqamas, which often means no place for wives and children.

The salary they earn here is enough to run the families back home but not enough to maintain them in the Kingdom. Even some highly paid professionals from Asia, Europe and the United States do not bring their families for the lack — or cost — of educational facilities for children and dearth of employment opportunities for women. In some cases employers help their employees to get visas for dependents but obviously refuse to shoulder any expenses.

This peculiar situation has created a category of “Gulf Wives” in the home countries. The worst hit are laborers from the south Indian state of Kerala, Bangladesh, the Philippines and Pakistan. According to one estimate, nearly two million people from two states in India — Kerala and Hyderabad — work in the Gulf. Most of them are men, and most of them are compelled to leave their families.

Many soon discover that “greener pastures” come at a price. “Money does not come easy,” says immigrant laborer Yasir Hasan, who has been doing carpentry jobs in Riyadh for 16 years. His wife is looking after their two children and an aging mother in Kerala. “My relatives talk about my wife’s loneliness and depression, but I am helpless as I cannot afford to bring them on my own,” he adds.

Loneliness is only one of the problems the wives face. There are innumerable cases of young women being left behind because of visa problems. Most Gulf states insist that immigrants must have a certain minimum wage to be eligible to bring their families. Unfortunately, this is beyond the reach of many laborers.

“We leave our homeland to make some money for our future. We also have to meet present responsibilities at home. That means we have to make sacrifices, or else what is the point of coming here,” said Abdul Ahmad, another immigrant from Kerala. He left his wife within a few days of marriage.

Some suggest that laborers should not marry if they cannot bring their wives.

But this is easier said than done. “My family pressured me to get married as soon as I turned 30. I couldn’t stay single forever. Hopefully, I will go back after a few years,” said Muhammad Dastur from Hyderabad.

Cheaper phone rates have increased the opportunity to at least keep in touch. “Just two years ago the cost was prohibitive and people used only public booths as mobile telephones and international line connections were difficult to get,” said Dastur. “A few minutes talk on Friday morning makes me and my wife very happy,” he added.

The older wives of other expatriates try to survive their boredom by attending to the requirements of their children, their studies, schools and extra classes. “At times, my wife finds it difficult because she has to take care of everything — banking, the kids’ studies, house work and so on,” said Muhammad Yusuf from Uttar Pradesh in northern India. His relatives used to help. “You can’t rely on them forever. Their hands are full and have their own worries,” he said. “In some cases, it creates more problems.”

“I have been here for 16 years and visit my country once every two years. I send money whenever it’s needed. Of course I’m happy that my family’s financial needs are taken care of, but I miss them very much too,” Yusuf said.

He hopes it is not too late when he ultimately returns home.