JEDDAH, 17 July 2005 — Saudis are becoming more inventive when it comes to their weddings. Not only do they want the reception and party to be unforgettable, they also are eager to be creative when choosing gifts and wedding bands.
Traditions worldwide generally dictate the groom should buy the engagement ring, but today it is not uncommon for the bride-to-be to buy the groom’s.
“When the groom asked my family for my hand, I went to buy his wedding band,” newlywed Dana Mahmoud told Arab News. “It means a lot to me to wear a ring that he bought, and I wanted him to feel the same way.” Dana said their parents found it strange at the beginning but that she cared more about his feelings — and he was pleased.
Arab News found that a large number of men would happily accept a wedding band from their wife to be, despite the obvious breach of tradition.
“Why should my bride not be allowed to buy me a wedding ring?” 30-year-old Baraa Hariri asked. “Is it fair for men to buy everything for the marriage including a SR100-500 ring? If she wants to get me a ring, it is a loving gesture, and I will always wear it as an sign of affection — something she treated me to.”
Mazen Yousif is a newly engaged man who is eager to seeing the wedding band his fiancee bought him. “I am looking forward to see what kind of ring she picked for me,” Yousif said. “There is no fun at all if I buy my own wedding band; it will be just like any pair of shoes or clothes I get for myself. I enjoyed choosing her ring, and I know she enjoyed her time when choosing mine. It was her idea, and it was great.” Although he isn’t comfortable wearing rings, he said he’ll wear the one his fiancee bought for him.
The concept of women choosing the wedding bands for their husbands is not well-received by everyone. Younger fathers accept the idea of their daughters buying something so significant for their spouses, but some in the older generation think it makes little sense.
“If she wants to show her love, she will have all the time she needs once she gets married,” said Salim Mahdi, a Saudi man in his 60s. “Why the rush?”
Nuha Saeed, a 22-year-old graduate, believes that when a girl starts buying gifts for her groom, he will get used to the idea of her buying things, and then it will become hard to change the pattern.
Sociology teacher Samia Ahmad agreed with the concept of brides-to-be buying gifts for their fiances, but she added a caveat. “Sometimes women will fret about what type of ring she will get for her fiance and what brand,” she said. “It becomes a competition. But it would be nice to start a relationship with giving and receiving without any complications, be it a wedding ring or anything. Religion does not forbid it so, why should we?”
