Q. What are the rights of husband and wife? When can a husband exercise the right of divorce? Do a woman’s parents have the right to interfere in her marriage, preventing her from going to her husband’s home?
(Name and address withheld)
A. It is very difficult to answer such a question. It is obvious that the reader has a particular case in mind, but he does not provide me with any details. Putting his question in such general terms will only give him a general answer, which may be inapplicable in his case because of things he has chosen not to mention.
In general terms both husband and wife are duty bound to treat each other with kindness and look after each other so that they find comfort and happiness in their family home. They need to look after each other’s needs, both physical and spiritual. It is their duty to help each other to maintain their chastity, and to encourage each other to lead a virtuous, Islamic life.
Divorce is a privilege God has granted to a man so as to terminate his marriage. By the same token, God granted the right of termination to the woman through khula’. Both rights can be exercised at any time, subject to taking certain aspects into consideration. These aspects are meant to regularize the divorce or khula’, so that they are done in conformity with Islamic requirements. What is important to realize is that divorce must never be resorted to as punishment to the wife or her family. It is a way out of a relationship that is deemed unsuccessful. Therefore, it must be approached with caution and care. When a person decides to get married, he takes a long time before he finally makes the decision, chooses the woman to marry and makes the necessary arrangements. Why is it that so many people resort to divorce, ending a marital relationship in a matter of seconds, without reflecting on the consequences that result from their action? Such consequences affect not only the couple concerned, but their children and their respective families.
The last part of the question is even more difficult to answer. Phrased in this manner, the answer is that a woman’s parents cannot stop her joining her husband in his home. But they may be right to do so in certain situations. I do not wish to speculate on this case.