He must have “the creeps.”

Of course, US Vice President Dick Cheney prefers giving others “the creeps” to get them himself.

But what a difference a year makes. Democrats demand answers. The American public is unhappy with Cheney and Bush, and not even $2 a gallon gas is making them feel better. Careers lie in ruins. Is Cheney’s among them?

It must be creepy for him to think about it. But that is how “the creeps” work. When you least expect it, you get that itchy-twitchy feeling as infinitesimally tiny hairs you didn’t even know were there suddenly prick your attention. Something you were looking at a moment ago with no attachment to whatsoever has just become, well, much more interesting to you. And not in a good way.

Surely Cheney doesn’t plan on jail being in his future.

Jail is for not-so-smart people.

Like New York Times writer Judith Miller who famously pumped everyone up over the false weapons of mass destruction evidence, and went to jail to protect Scooter Libby, who is now facing serious criminal charges for allegedly “outing” CIA agent Victoria Plame. Now Bob Woodward, who famously kept “Deep Throat’s” identity secret for decades, has fingered another White House figure as “outing” Plame prior to Libby. Washington society can play the name, blame and Plame game for a long time, but Cheney is very possibly Woodward’s source.

Woodward could just name whoever it is, and put the whole thing to bed. Why doesn’t he?

Because if Cheney is Woodward’s source, Cheney could be joining Libby on the outskirts of power shortly. It matters not one jot or tittle whether Woodward ever acted on the information.

Things have just become very complicated indeed.

Why didn’t the Special Prosecutor talk to Woodward, whose unique “White House access” gives him a lucrative life of one best-seller after another? Woodward’s books are inimitable as long as “White House sources” talk only to him. What’s the quid pro quo there?

Creepy.

At his core, Cheney is a superb politician. And Cheney has been able to put people into positions of power where they will most benefit him. Like his daughter, Liz, who Cheney has placed in a key position she could likely never have achieved had hers been merely one of a thousand resumes in Rice’s inbox at State. Liz showed up this week as US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice’s traveling companion to Saudi Arabia, Bahrain, and other exotic Middle East locales, carrying along a title big enough to fill a matching set of Louis Vuitton bags.

Cheney’s Liz is America’s deputy assistant secretary of state, also known when speaking off the record as “a senior State Department official.”

Most Americans would have to at least take the strenuous Foreign Service exam to even get close to the kind of dream jobs that regularly come Liz Cheney’s way. Liz and Dad Cheney fly on Air Force Two, lay wreaths at tombs around the world, and hit cocktail parties in wrinkle-free pantsuits. Reporters who want to ride along are careful to describe Liz’s behavior, like less-than-devout text-messaging on her Blackberry during the late Ronald Reagan’s funeral, as evidence of her “fierce intensity.”

It would not be inconceivable for Liz to become secretary of state, replacing Rice when Rice goes on to become, say...vice president. Or president.

And does the good news for Liz Cheney stop there? No! Her husband, Philip J. Perry, a Washington, D.C. lawyer-lobbyist, was recently nominated general counsel to the Department of Homeland Security. Before that, Phil was a lawyer-lobbyist for Lockheed Martin, where Liz’s mother was on the board of directors.

And while three years of law school is nice training in the Socratic method and all (that means you learn how to answer a question with a question), usually people have to hustle hard to become the lead lawyer for all the other lawyers at Homeland Security.

But being able to answer a question with a question could come in pretty handy for a Cheney appointee.

Phil worked first for Lockheed Martin through his firm, then reportedly landed at the Office of Management and Budget (OMB) in March, 2001. Some claim Phil worked on the Patriot Act there.

But what is striking is that Phil’s OMB experience apparently overlapped with David Safavian, another conservative OMB lawyer-lobbyist who is now in hot water for allegedly playing expensive games of golf and otherwise consorting with Jack Abramoff.

An anonymous tipster complained about Safavian in late March 2003, but the probe moved slowly. By August 2003, if not before, Phil quietly left OMB and returned to Lockheed work.

Safavian stayed and was even promoted while he answered just enough questions to find himself arrested in 2005.

Did Phil dodge that bullet?

Creepy!