JEDDAH, 14 May 2006 — Business for professional matchmakers has risen by 60 percent in the Kingdom following the legalization of “misyar” (marriage without obligations), according to a local Arabic newspaper.
One reason why people resort to such secret but legal options is to avoid family responsibilities and others such as housing a woman and rearing her children.
Such marriages have grown in popularity in the business community, among educated people and among women with private income as well as with the poor. The increasing number of unmarried women is another reason why such marriages have become more acceptable, Al-Watan newspaper said yesterday.
It is very easy to get willing misyar brides and grooms. “This kind of marriage is popular because it needs only a room in a hotel or a rented apartment for a few hours or days. Having made the misyar contract, either one of the parties calls the other to fix the time and place where they should meet,” said Abu Muhammad Al-Yafei, a Jeddah-based professional matchmaker.
An aging businessman may want to enjoy life legitimately while his wife has lost all her physical charms. An expatriate can make his stay in the country much easier and less stressful with such a marriage. A divorced woman may want to break the monotony of her life with somebody to share her emotions.
Umm Habiba, a matchmaker, says people are getting used to the idea and gradually shedding their disapproval. A middle-aged woman, Umm Hamza, said she agreed to a misyar marriage because of poverty.
“I am divorced with three children and I am not qualified for work and my income is not enough to take care of our bare necessities. So I approached a matchmaker who suggested a misyar husband. I demanded a modest dowry and a monthly allowance to support me and my children and nothing more,” she said. “The man I found is an official in the education department whose wife is suffering from an infectious disease. He comes twice a week to my home. His wife is not aware of his relations with me. However his grown-up children who have learned about our secret are against me and so I am afraid that he may stop coming.”
