The Prophet encouraged his companions not only to spread the use of the greeting of peace, but also to be the ones who start by offering this greeting to others, whether they know them or not.
His companions were always keen to implement his guidance in practice. Some were very diligent in this regard that they would implement every order or recommendation. Perhaps one of the most diligent in this respect was Abdullah ibn Umar. Convinced beyond any shred of doubt that whatever the Prophet did or said was only good and for the benefit of both individual and community, Ibn Umar was keen to implement it fully. With regard to greeting others, he was aware of the Prophet’s commendation of a person who offered greetings to others without waiting for them to greet him first.
Hence, Ibn Umar was always the one to start. Basheer ibn Yasar reports: “No one could be the first to greet Ibn Umar with the greeting of peace.” (Related by Al-Bukhari in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad)
This is the proper attitude the Prophet taught, and Ibn Umar implemented it and encouraged others to do so. Ibn Umar reports: “Al-Agharr (a companion of the Prophet from the Muzaynah tribe) had a quantity of dates owed to him by a man from the clan of Amr ibn Awf, and he went to him several times (asking settlement). ‘I went to the Prophet and he sent Abu Bakr with me. As we walked, everyone whom we met offered us the greeting of peace. Abu Bakr said to me: Don’t you see how people are the first to greet you to earn more reward?” Abdullah ibn Umar adds encouraging his audience: “Be the one who starts in order to gain the greater reward.” (Related by Al-Bukhari in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad and Al-Tabarani)
The first part of this Hadith is not related to our topic of greeting, but we will say briefly that this man, Al-Agharr, went to the Prophet to complain when another person was slow in settling his debt. This was the last resort for the Prophet’s companions, and the Prophet always tried to help whoever is demanding his rights. In this instance, he sent Abu Bakr as support and to emphasize to the debtor that the case was now with the Prophet. He had no option but to settle.
It was natural that people should greet Abu Bakr as he passed by them, because they were aware of his close relation with the Prophet and they held him in high esteem. Abu Bakr tried to point to his companion that he should be keen to get the greater reward. He puts it in a most gentle manner, reminding his companion of an easy way to earn reward.
People may be in dispute or may quarrel with each other, and then they are not on speaking terms. If offering a greeting is obligatory, then they are in trouble for not fulfilling an obligation. In order not to overburden people, God has made offering a greeting when people meet a recommended practice, but answering a greeting offered to us is obligatory. A Muslim simply may not ignore a greeting offered to him, even by one whom he is boycotting. Abu Ayyoub quotes the Prophet as saying: “It is not lawful for any Muslim to boycott his brother for more than three nights. They may meet and both of them turn away from each other. The better one of the two is the one who offers the greeting of peace to the other.” (Related by Al-Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawood and Al-Tirmidhi)
This Hadith states a principle and provides a graphic description of a case for acting on it. The principle is that of not allowing a dispute that leads to a boycott of one Muslim by another to last more than three days or three nights. The three-day period is allowed in order to give a chance for tempers to cool down and grievances to be aired. But the boycott must end after three nights. This applies to all Muslims, but it applies with greater vigor to members of the same family.
The graphic description is that of two people who are in dispute. When they meet, each of them turns away from the other. If they are to apply the principle, one of them has to start by greeting the other. The one who starts is recognized by the Prophet as being the better of the two.
Although all these Hadiths use the masculine form, they apply equally to men and women. This is standard in Arabic, and in Islam. The Qur’anic address applies to men and women, unless it is specifically applicable to women only.
But people may not be fully aware of what reward they miss by not greeting others. Hence the Prophet spells this out so that we are certain of the reward we get for greeting others. Abu Hurayrah reports: “As the Prophet was sitting with a group of people a man passed by and said: “Peace be to you, or assalam alaikum.” The Prophet said: “Ten good deeds.” Another man then passed by and said: “Peace and God’s mercy be to you, or assalam alaikum wa rahmatullah.” The Prophet said: “Twenty good deeds.” A third man said as he passed by: “Peace, God’s mercy and blessings be to you, or assalam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh.” The Prophet said: “Thirty good deeds.” Then a man stood up and left the group without saying any greeting. The Prophet said: “How quickly your friend has forgotten! If one of you comes to a group, he should begin with a greeting. Then if he likes to sit with them, he may do so. If he leaves, he should also say a greeting. The first greeting is no more important than the second.” (Related by Al-Bukhari in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad and Al-Nassaie)
To start with, when each of the three men offered a greeting, the Prophet and his companions replied to the greeting. This goes without saying because, as we have explained earlier, offering a greeting is recommended but replying to it is obligatory. The Prophet would not have left out an obligatory duty in any situation. The reporter of the Hadith does not mention the Prophet’s reply because it is taken for granted. He wanted to emphasize the two points made clear in this Hadith. The first one is that of the reward. The better the greeting the greater the reward. Since, a good deed is rewarded by at least ten times its worth, the first man earned the reward of ten good deeds, while the second earned double that because his greeting was a better one since he added a wish for God’s mercy to be granted to the people he was greeting. The third man added more, and he earned more.
The other point in this Hadith is that another greeting is due on departure. Thus, when two people part they should greet each other, and if one is leaving a group, he should say a greeting of peace before he leaves. The Prophet makes it clear that this greeting at the point of departure is no less important than the first one offered on meeting others.
Arab News Islam 27 December 2002