The wives of the Prophet (peace be upon him) were often visited by the companions of the Prophet despite the fact that they were ordered to always be behind a screen when they met men. Visits did take place during the Prophet’s lifetime and more often after he had passed away, for a variety of purposes. An authentic Hadith speaking of a time when the Prophet was still alive mentions that Umar visited three of the Prophet’s wives in succession, asking about something that puzzled him. The first of these was Lady Hafsah, his own daughter; the second was Lady Umm Salamah who was related to him; and the third was Lady Ayesha. The purpose of his visits was to counsel them against something he heard that they did at home which he felt to be wrong.
Umar ibn Al-Khattab reported: “I was deliberating over something when my wife said to me: ‘If you would do this or that...’ I said: ‘Why are you interfering in my affairs? Why do you interfere in something that does not concern you?’ She said: ‘Amazing is your attitude, Ibn Al-Khattab! You do not want to be objected to when your daughter objects to the Prophet and he would remain angry for the rest of the day!’ Umar put on his clothes and went to see his daughter, Hafsah. He said to her: ‘Daughter! Is it true that you sometimes object to the Prophet and he would be angry the whole day?’ She said: ‘We do certainly object to things.’ He said: ‘Then I warn you lest you incur God’s punishment, or incur the Prophet’s anger.’ (Then referring to Ayesha, he added) Daughter! Do not be tempted to do like the one who seems to feel proud of her beauty and how the Prophet loves her.’” Continuing his report, Umar said: “I then left her and went to Umm Salamah to speak to her about this. She said to me: ‘How amazing is your attitude, Ibn Al-Khattab! You have interfered in everything and now you want to interfere between the Prophet and his wives?’ Her words affected me so strongly that I calmed a bit.” (Related by Al-Bukhari and Muslim.) In the version related by Muslim more details are added, quoting Umar: “I went to Ayesha and said to her: ‘I have heard that you, Abu Bakr’s daughter, sometimes cause the Prophet to be upset.’ She said: ‘What is your concern in this? Why do you not advise your own daughter?’”
We see how Umar was troubled by what his wife told him about his daughter and how she could have an argument with her husband, the Prophet. This is an ordinary matter, which happens in every home, but Umar belonged to the Quraysh, the Makkan tribe where women were subdued and could not object to what their husbands might decide. Perhaps we should add that Umar did not speak to any of the three from outside her home. In the Arabic text, the expression in each case reads: “I entered her place.”
Visits to the Prophet’s wives could be social, having no particular purpose other than that. Many are the reports mentioning such visits. Masrooq, who belonged to the generation that succeeded the Prophet’s companions, i.e. the Tabieen, reports: “We visited Ayesha and found Hassan ibn Thabit at her place, reciting some of his poetry. In one line he described her as: ‘Chaste, sagacious and above suspicion. She never indulges in gossip about other women.’ Ayesha said to him: ‘But you are unlike that.’ Masrooq said to her: ‘Why do you allow him to visit you when God said about the event in which he was involved, “awesome suffering awaits the one who took on himself the lead among them”? She said: ‘What suffering is greater than blindness? Besides, he used his poetry to defend the Prophet.’” (Related by Al-Bukhari and Muslim.)
Al-Aswad reports: “A number of young men visited Ayesha when she was in Mina. They were laughing as they entered. She asked them the cause of their laughter. They mentioned someone and said that he fell over a tent rope so badly that he almost lost his eye or his life. She said: ‘Do not laugh at him. I heard the Prophet saying that any Muslim who suffers pain, even as little as a thorn in his body, will be raised a step in his position and a sin will be removed from his record.’” (Related by Muslim.)
These two Hadiths speak of ordinary visits by different people. What is reported in both is an ordinary conversation. There seems to be no particular purpose for these visits other than the social one. In the first report, Masrooq mentions that he visited her with some other people, and they found Hassan at her place reciting poetry that included some praise of her. The conversation focused on the poetry and Hassan’s position. Hassan belonged to the Ansar and he was an excellent, fine poet who recorded some of the major events of the early years of Islam in his poetry. At the time, poetry was the major media that circulated news in Arabia. There were some fine poets among the unbelievers who used their talent to attack Islam and the Prophet. A number of the Prophet’s companions replied to them, giving Islam an effective medium to present its case and ensuring that the Prophet’s position was well defended. Hassan was the best of these poets. However, when the false rumors about Ayesha were circulated by some hypocrites, Hassan was involved and repeated the rumor. He was punished for that along with a few others. He later repented of his behavior and Ayesha pardoned him, recognizing the importance of his use of his poetic talent in the service of Islam.
In the second Hadith, we see some young men visiting Ayesha during her stay in Mina when she was performing the pilgrimage. She uses the visit to teach them an important aspect of Islamic manners. No one should laugh at someone else’s misfortune. She puts that in the best form: what is there to laugh at if someone tripped and had some injury, when the pain he suffers will ensure that he is given reward by God, in the form of increasing his good deeds and decreasing his bad ones? This seems to call for congratulations, rather than to be laughed at.