Question: Many times have I been disappointed throughout my life. I have tried different paths, I have moved in several directions, but then the various circumstances I had to face made me lose most of my initial enthusiasm. The main reason was because I have met people who, instead of encouraging and supporting me, have instilled doubts into my convictions. It was enough for me to hear a simple comment, a small criticism or observation about my plans or actions from someone else to make my mood change, to make me feel uncertain about my choices. Sometimes I even wonder what is the real reason of my existence.
Answer: The well-known Irish play-right George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950) said, “The only service a friend can really render is to keep up your courage by holding up to you a mirror in which you can see a noble image of yourself”. A friend might not be totally “lenient”, if he (or she) has to be sincere, but it is his responsibility to help you see the good side of yourself. His words are of paramount importance. In fact words – either your own or someone else’s – have a great impact on your psyche because they have the power to create both positive and negative moods in your deeper self. And your mood, i.e. how you “feel”, is the spring that pushes you toward action. Scientists have discovered some enzymes that are directly connected with feelings and which, consequently, regulate the behavior of the cells in the human body. What does this mean? It means that, if you keep nursing positive feelings on a regular basis, your cells will greatly benefit and work accordingly. But… the same happens if you usually allow, accept and entertain negative moods.
In such case the cells in your body will be guided in a different direction, with — of course — different results. Without waiting for long-term consequences, just think about some common situations your found yourself in more than once. Right after you’ve had a fight, you start having stomachache. When someone goes on talking about unpleasant stuff, you end up developing a headache. Did you hear sad news? You feel pain in your heart. Do you feel loved and gratified? Your whole body spurts energy and joy.
Can you see how important feelings are in the economy of life, what the effects are on its quality? You must therefore start to truly believe in your capacities and skills, in your intelligence and ability. By simply trusting yourself more, you will be encouraged to step out of your shell and face life with a more positive attitude. Don’t listen to those who, possibly because they, themselves, feel frustrated and unhappy, try to pull you down into the pit of mistrust and doubt. If you do not expect the worst — a clear sign of uncertainty — you can be sure that everything will turn out all right. Why? Because this is the truth.
All human beings are here on Earth for a reason, and don’t forget that it is always a positive reason, no matter what the appearances might be. If you succeed in “waking up” (a term that I keep repeating because it is the essence of what we are trying to do here!) you will find yourself on the top of the highest tower, almost up in the cloud. From there, will you be able to have a full, clear view of what is going on, will you understand yourself and your life better, will you be “aware”. You will see that each thing, person, situation, action, has a precise, perfect collocation in the enfolding of the drama – or the play — that we call “human existence”. It is up to you, as far as you are personally concerned — to turn your existence into the former or the latter.
Exercise — ask yourself and answer honestly:
Why do I accept to listen to that friend (or relative, or colleague…) who is always complaining about everything, who criticizes everyone, who tries to convince me that nothing goes well, that we are all destined to fail? Am I scared to lose their friendship? But… Do I really need such kind of friendship?
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Blog: recreateyourlifetoday.blogspot.com
Creative Thinking: Dangerous friends
