My dear son,
While this message
Reaches your hands
When you listen
To the sound of
My silence
Forget not my son
I am no more
In your midst.
You may be an expert
Who detects
The sounds of
Heart’s murmurs.
Are you an expert
Who detects
The beats of (my)
Heart’s flutters?
Agonies surround me
Sorrows envelop me
Miseries are part of me
Why do you
Turn away from me?
Are you not my blood?
Are you not my flesh?
Are you not my bones?
As you are my blood
Don’t you feel
My weeping heart’s beats?
While you are my bones
Don’t you feel my pains?
When you are my flesh
Don’t you recognize my anguish?
Remember my dear,
Without me
You wouldn’t be here.
Your root is trembling
The shoot is shaking
The whole tree is decaying
Longing to speak
Touch, feel and share
Life’s agonies,
Fears, intense sorrows,
Weak tender words
Can’t describe.
My dear son
Why do you
Abandon me?
Why are you
So hard on me?
Am I not your father?
Are you not my son?
Do you not hear
The silence of my sound?
In my last moments of life
I cried, sobbed and wept
Not because I am to die
Nor death is close by
Death to me is a blessing,
Solace and comfort.
Resurrection is possible
Only when you die.
Life has meaning
Only in death.
Life is meaningless
Without Hereafter.
To live is to die.
Oh, my dear son
Let me ask you
A tender question
It is between
You and me.
Why have you
Discarded me?
Is it because
I am so poor and
You are so rich?
Is it because
I am worthless and
You are the worthiest?
Is it because
I hold my miseries, anguish
And misfortunes as
My only wealth
That you don’t want to share?
You abandoned me
When I needed
Your attachment.
You hated me
When I yearned for
Your tender love.
There is no point
In crying over
Spilt milk.
On my death bed
All familiar faces
Paled and waved
Signs of farewell gestures.
Few poured empathy
Many showed sympathy.
In despair
With emerging hope
My nervous eyes
Bulged through
The sockets
Searched far and near
Wished to project
The image of me
In the mirror of
Your dry face.
Where are you my son?
When everyone had
Shed his tears
I expected your
Hands to rise up
To wipe my tearful eyes.
When everyone whispers
Into my ears
I waited to hear
Your sorrowful sighs and sobs.
Let me open out my heart,
Let me relax for a minute
In my silent weep.
My dear,
Now
Minutes are passing
My memory is fading
Light is dimming
My sight is blurring
Words are slurring
My body is sinking
Mind is splitting
My soul is rising
Death is nearing
I am departing.
Be relaxed a while
And listen
To my last words.
When the bad
News comes
Do not cry
Do not be sad.
Do not try to project
False emotions
As if you are
Grief-stricken.
Be bold
Be honest
Be straightforward.
Tear away
Your cover
Throw away
Your mask
Show to all
Your real face.
Good bye.
Your dying father.
(Arab News Features 19 December 2002)
