In one of the Arabic daily papers, there was an article about a disturbing incident. A woman had been “physically assaulted” in public by her husband. Apparently her husband gave her instructions about when to meet him at the car and he went off with the woman who was to become his second wife in order to buy some gold. The first wife who had the children with her was late in meeting him at the car; she had been busy buying needed items for the children. In anger, the man slapped her in public “to teach her a lesson.”
The reporter had the audacity to call this incident “The Scenario of the Hot Slap!” It gave the details in satirical, instead of condemnatory, terms. The words used did not reflect the ugliness of the incident nor the man’s immorality and violation of his wife. There was no mention of the absence of any system or regulation to punish or “slap back” in the name of justice.
Many groups in the community accept this kind of injustice — which amounts to tyranny. They consider it to be part of the husband’s rights over his wife. It is something that is wrong and it has been common for so long that it has become the norm. When we demand that a woman’s rights be maintained and preserved, we do not mean giving her what is not rightfully hers. We are not talking about allowing a woman to have four husbands. We are not talking about women becoming imams in mosques. We are asking that women be given the basic and instinctive rights that are theirs in the first place. We are demanding that they be given the right to live like any other human being and to be treated humanely and considerately and not be deprived of their dignity. They have a right to their self-respect and integrity. They have every right to their bodies and their character and a right not to be violated and humiliated in public and in front of their children.
Perhaps in this case, the husband was nudged into action by his bride-to-be and he obliged her as if his wife and the mother of his children was no more than a creature without feelings, rights or dignity. He supposedly wanted to exhibit and exercise his manhood by such behavior. He forgot, however, and dismissed the teachings of our Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) who instructed us to either partner our wives gently or to let them go.
Would such a man approve of his sister, daughter or mother being treated this way? And for such a petty reason? He had no right to behave in such a manner even were he within the privacy of his home.
In such a community, how are we to demand that women be educated and appointed to leading professional positions in government and the private sector? We live in the absence of a system that fails to protect women from these animals that humiliate, torture, insult and embezzle from her? How can we demand the rights of women be recognized and implemented when we are still dabbling in issues such as “to cover or not to cover the face”.
It is true that Islam guarantees the rights of women but unfortunately we who call ourselves Muslims have not given them their rights. Those who rant and rave about women issues, what have you done regarding women’s rights? What drove that husband to behave in such a manner? Is he not safe from any reprimand? Does his conduct not reflect an internal community conviction that all and every right belongs to the husband while the women is “rightless”? Is this not due to the absence of regulations and systems to protect and maintain rights?
I will admit, however, that my heart was glad and my temper cooled when I reached the end of the article. The wife informed her brothers who came and asked the husband to step outside. Then they beat him into unconsciousness. At the police station, they denied beating him as revenge for what had been done to their sister. They said the beating was due to a financial problem. Goof for them and good for her.
