JEDDAH, 9 October 2005 — Is the price of education marital woe? A recent study conducted by Um Al-Qura University in Makkah reports that educated couples are more likely to get divorced or have marital problems. Is ignorance marital bliss? When Arab News looked into this issue, we asked people for their takes on the study’s findings.
Sociologist Wafaa Al-Saadi said educated people have their own mind and when they get married they may not develop a shared mindset on many matters.
“That creates quarrels in their daily life which can lead to divorce,” Al-Saadi said. She added that the nature of the mind of the Eastern man doesn’t necessarily accept the fact that his wife can be more successful than he is.
An attorney contacted by Arab News disagreed both with the sociologist and the study, maintaining that better education made for better marriages.
In fact, attorney Dr. Mohammad Jaber Nader said he thought that there was an inverse relationship that joins education and divorce.
“Cultured husbands are more aware of the responsibilities of married life,” Nader said. “I don’t mean higher degrees only; I also mean that they are more open-minded in how to make their marriage a shared life between them and their wives in all life matters.”
The lower number of children born to well-educated couples also proves that education and successful marriage should go together. Nader noted that such couples know that a larger number of children makes child rearing more difficult.
“Having a small number of children allows educated parents to take better care of each child in the family,” he said.
Education and knowledge make couples think of the noble aim of marriage, which is sharing a lifetime together in all aspects. Nader observed that less education and knowledge usually make husbands think of marriage on the physical level only. As the old saying goes, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”
“Less awareness in marriage leads to more polygamy,” Nader said. “A husband tries to find more pleasure with the new wife without thinking of the consequences behind polygamy.”
Nader pointed that God legalized polygamy; however, He said that a husband should be fair to all his wives. If he can’t, then he should restrict himself to one marriage.
“Cultured people will think many times before ending a marriage,” the attorney said.
Arab News then sought out one of Saudi Arabia’s true marriage experts — a wife.
“As long as couples have similar mindsets and ways of thinking, they will understand themselves better, and married life can continue without obstacles,” said Amal Ayyoub, a middle-aged wife.
As for education, Ayyoub said it was more of a matter of compatibility than degree — educational degree, that is “two simple minds would go together just as well as two sophisticated minds.”
