I miss the good old days. And I’m guessing you do too. But if we were to attempt to identify exactly when these so-called good old days were, it’s likely we would point to different dates. For me, the good old days began right around the time I got my first pager and ended immediately before social media became a common buzzword.

I loved my pager. I loved the feeling of instant access it gave me, making me feel powerful and connected to the world. I felt like I could move faster, more efficiently, miss fewer opportunities, and be a part of so much more. But what I love most about my pager in hindsight, was the option I had to never reply. But now we are in an always-on era, where that freedom no longer appears to exist.

We’ve often studied historical adversity through large-scale, tangible shifts, such as resource-based or geographic constraints, but this current erosion has happened subtly, under our noses, one comment after another. Canadian philosopher Marshall McLuhan’s eternal phrase the medium is the message has never been more relevant today.

When McLuhan coined this term in 1964 he was pointing out that the medium that we choose to communicate is where the true message is expressed. A medium, regardless of shape or form, will never be a neutral vessel, void of meaning in itself. When explaining the title of his book, he wrote: “A medium is not something neutral. It does something to people. It takes hold of them, it rubs them up, it massages them, it bumps them around.” In other words, it’s a lot easier to avoid a boorish exchange of insults with a stranger via one’s pager than it is in the comment section on TikTok.

While the Internet began with a healthy dose of starry-eyed, democratic optimism, we quickly headed into uncharted waters, as social connectivity demanded more from us and soon morphed into an entirely different beast altogether.

American social psychologist Jonathan Haidt has said: “Social media has both magnified and weaponized the frivolous,” and goes on to question whether the health of democracy in the US is truly improved by Twitter spats and Facebook arguments.

McLuhan’s theory argues that the way a message is delivered is influenced a great deal by the channel it is delivered through. If that is the case, then this whole rhapsody, the path that we have laid out before ourselves, appears to reveal itself as terminal.

When the frivolousness is magnified, we lose perspective on scale. We are unable to prioritize effectively. We disassociate from our own lives and our local communities, while getting sucked into emotional tides that aren’t even ours to begin with. We form and exchange opinions on everything, fueled by emotion, hearsay, and little to no concrete knowledge. These opinions become a sea of white noise, making it harder to cut through. To break through the noise, we become even more obtuse and blunt.

This dynamic shift has been noted in the real world as well, as our interactions extend beyond the digital realm. Increased incivility is everywhere, including in business. A Portland State University study last August concluded that staff who experienced, or even just witnessed incivilities, have a higher tendency to act uncivilly toward others. This tracks across all levels, from entry-level workers to heads of business.

A byproduct of social media shows that, in part, rudeness affects our mental health. It leads to depression, anxiety, dysregulation, and decreased motivation. At its core, rudeness is a severance of connection, which in turn leads to a greater severance of identity. And when a social system is so badly severed that common meanings no longer hold, we enter a state of societal suicide that, many fear we have already begun.

But it isn’t all pure nihilism just yet. Maybe it’s wistful thinking to reference the good old days. But maybe there’s still something there. Many markets indicate a wide-scale, yearning for a simple life. As flippant as it may sound, spending more time away from our phones and in nature might have a greater impact on the way we do business than we think. It encourages us to return to possibly less inflammatory mediums of communication, such as a phone call, or a face-to-face conversation — and maybe even some good, old fashioned eye contact.

• Carla DiBello is a documentarian and founder and CEO of CDB Advisory, a bespoke consulting firm that bridges connections across private sectors throughout the Middle East and North America. Twitter: @CarlaDiBello