It was another hectic day at work where hours passed by without me having the time to pay any attention to the growling of my poor stomach. When the day was finally over, I realized I could not possibly wait until I get back home to have a decent meal.
So, when the big M of McDonald’s flashed on the side I decided to stop by and grab my long-awaited bite. As soon as I entered the place I came across a swarm of kids lingering at the counter. They were screaming and laughing at the unfortunate man who could not possibly keep track of their orders.
It all seemed like a circus show with a brother screaming at his sister and another tossing napkins in the air while one kept climbing the counter then jumping to the floor. It was all so annoying that I looked around to see where these children’s parents could be. To my great surprise, there weren’t any.
The only grownups accompanying those children were a couple of Asian maids who were busily engaged in conversation. One of them was actually showing the other her new mobile phone with its new ringing tones.
While the children were wreaking havoc, one little boy screamed at the Filipino behind the counter and started to call him bad names. The man calmly asked him to lower his voice, but the little kid starting spitting on him instead. The employees were so shocked by this behavior that they started murmuring to one another.
The whole scene must have happened in a matter of seconds. I was so embarrassed by what this kid was doing that it was awkward for me to stand by. I wanted to teach this little kid how to behave himself. So, I approached the boy and asked him politely to stop his shameful acts. He never answered my call, but rather asked me with his yellow smile: “Are you Saudi?”
I was so taken back by his question. It was written all over my uncovered face. Regardless of the fact that I am a Saudi, I did not honestly know what difference would my nationality make if I wanted to offer advice. But I knew right then that my initiative would be something I will most definitely later regret. I couldn’t guess what this brat’s reaction might be, and I must admit I was afraid to lose my temper and let the matter really get out of hand.
I was overwhelmed with rage. I couldn’t think of anything to do but to ignore him and approach the maids who were still sitting in their corner. I asked them to at least pay attention to what the children were doing. Then I walked out of the place, red-faced with embarrassment.
I forgot all about my craving for food, but I couldn’t erase the horrible minutes I had to witness in the restaurant. Part of me was furious over the boy’s behavior and also my response. Yet, a greater part of me was mad at his parents who obviously did not teach him any manners. It’s very hard to imagine how careless and irresponsible parents must be to not notice such disturbing attitudes and behavior from a child his age.
When children act offensively it is the duty of parents to repress such behavior. Otherwise, children grow up believing there is nothing wrong with what they are doing and so carry on with their obnoxious behavior.
What can make matters even worse is when some families encourage their children to be rude without realizing it when they consider their children’s rough attitude as toughness and indication of strong personality. Such behavior from children can only lead to a chain of other negative habits they can easily adopt as they grow older.
It’s also important for all family members to watch all the actions and words used freely in their conversation around the house because children pick those up really fast. Simple expressions of politeness, such as “thank you,” “please” or “excuse me” must be emphasized. Children also must learn to politely look after their needs and not demand them.
Unfortunately, it saddens me to say that many families fail to understand the importance of these basic courtesies. Such parents not only neglect values; they also distort the innocent image of childhood. It also projects a negative image of our whole community. If people here could only cherish the true values and essence of Islam, which clearly mandates good manners, our way of living would differ tremendously.
(Safinaz Zakariya Murshid is a Saudi writer. She is based in Riyadh.)