DUBAI: Amazon MGM Studios is on whatever the opposite of a roll is. A plunge? Anyway, if you thought “Melania” was as bad as movie-making can get, get a load of “The Runner.”
Gal Gadot stars as Maia — a “brilliant” lawyer and single mom living in London with her diabetic son Noah. She drops Noah off at school (but doesn’t actually escort him in like she usually does) and sets off on her daily run into work. As she’s jogging through one of the many scenic parks in the movie (London being the only feature that actually elevates “The Runner”) she receives a call from a sinister “freelancer” (Damian Lewis — and it’s a little on-the-nose that director Kevin Macdonald has him literally phoning his performance in). He’s kidnapped Noah, hacked his insulin dispenser, and put him in a hypoglycemic coma that will be fatal if he doesn’t get the injection Maia carries with her. The hitch? She won’t get Noah’s location unless, within a very tight deadline, she murders a key witness in her case who’ll be testifying against a mob boss. So far, so familiar. The twist, if it can be described as such, is that Maia has to run the five miles to the witness’ hotel, ostensibly so that she’s easy for the freelancer to track. He’s in her ear throughout, creepily reminding her that his IT wizardry means he has access to all her personal details.
There are, then, many, many shots of Gadot running through London. And she does a reasonable job of looking increasingly exhausted as she navigates several setbacks — genuine or engineered — that upset the kidnapper. Watching someone run for this long is pretty dull, even with nice scenery, so… it’s special effects time! If poorly rendered distorted slo-mo shots reminiscent of a late-Eighties acid house video qualify as “special.”
At least being out of breath means Gadot — not the most convincing actor at the best of times, and this is far from the best of times — has fewer lines of dialogue to non-emote through. Although even someone of Lewis’ caliber is unable to imbue lines like “I know you better than you know yourself” with anything approaching character.
To be fair, the big plot reveal is pretty slick, but everything — everything — else about “The Runner” is so awful that you’ll have switched off by then. You will not regret doing so.
