After he adopted Islam and experienced the happiness provided to him by his close association with the Prophet (peace be upon him), nothing gave Umar ibn Al-Khattab greater pleasure than his daughter’s marriage to the Prophet. This was beyond his wildest dreams. Hence, he was always keen to ensure that the Prophet should find in Hafsah a wife that brought him comfort and happiness. He kept counseling her to do her duty to her husband and not to engage in anything that would displease him. After all, she was married to the man God had chosen to deliver His last message to mankind and to provide, by word and action, a perfect model of Islamic refined manners and serious morality.
Young people, however, do not look at things in the same way as their elders. They may acknowledge that their parents have had more experience, but they tend to dismiss such experience as irrelevant to their own situation. Hafsah, a young wife in her early twenties coming into a home where there were already two wives, appears to have tried to carve a strong position for herself.
One day Umar said something to his wife, but she objected to it. Brought up in the Makkan traditions of the time, he said to her: “How come you object to something that I say when it is none of your business.” She said: “Why should I not object when the Prophet’s wives may object to him. In fact, any of them might sulk and the Prophet might remain upset all day.” Umar felt that was very serious. He feared that his daughter could do that when it was very unpleasant to any husband. Moreover, he loved the Prophet so much that he would try to remove anything that could displease him. Therefore, he went to Hafsah and said to her: “Is it true that you might sulk all day long?” When she acknowledged that, he admonished her with all the love and care a father feels when he realizes that his daughter was on a dangerous course. He said: “Daughter! I warn you against incurring God’s punishment and the displeasure of His messenger.” Referring to Ayeshah, he counseled her not to join her into action motivated by jealousy: “Do not be tempted by your mate who is proud of her beauty and the Prophet’s love. You know that the Prophet does not have the same love for you. Had it not been for me, he might have divorced you.”
Yet Hafsah had inherited a strong character. How could she miss out when she was Umar’s daughter? She was ready to express her opinion, even in objection to the Prophet on a matter of religion. The Prophet once said: “None of my companions who gave me their pledges under the tree will ever be in hell.” This was a reference to the Prophet’s 1400 companions who tried to do the Umrah with him in Makkah, but the unbelievers tried to prevent their entry into the city. The standoff threatened to culminate into a battle and the Prophet sought a pledge from his companions to fight until death. They all readily gave him that pledge when he was standing under a tree. Shortly afterward, the Al-Hudaybiyah peace treaty was signed between the two parties. In the Qur’an, God states clearly that He is pleased with those companions of the Prophet.
When the Prophet said this, Hafsah said: “Yes, they will do.” The Prophet was displeased with her, but she recited the verse that says in reference to hell: “There is not one among you who shall not pass over it: This is, for your Lord, a decree that must be fulfilled.” (19:71) The Prophet answered: “But God also said: ‘But We shall save those who are God-fearing, and leave the wrongdoers there, on their knees.’ (19: 72)”
