The author, disheartened by a recurrent scenario at school when she picks up her children, talks about the number of maids present in lieu of mothers who are sleeping at home or who should be leaving work to pick up their children.
She ends the article with an example of the dire consequences of handing over children to the care of the maids and drivers. I speak as a working mother when I say that while these cases exist, it is an unjust depiction of mothers in general and does not take into consideration personal, external, economic, and other factors.
The article examines some serious problems in our society. However, the author failed miserably at making a balanced argument that showcases some of the varied circumstances of mothers. The main focus portrayed was that of mothers who spend their days sleeping and hand over their children to maids.
While a sizable portion may constitute this type of mother, there are other categories that were not alluded to at all; single mothers who must provide for their family, married mothers for whom work may or may not be an option, and mothers who possess talent, skills, and knowledge that serve the greater humanity by applying them in the workforce, etc.
“How is it possible for a mother, whether employed or unemployed, to hand over her small kids to a fake mother?” Let me ask the author another question: Have you ever thought that some mothers do not have a choice but to work in order to feed their children and to send them to these schools from which they cannot pick them up?
While I sense the author is exuding an air of superiority in mothering skills for merely picking up her kids from school, one could argue that a zombie of a mother could do so yet does nothing else with them all day long. Parenting is complex and multifaceted, and that did not come across in the article. A mother who picks up her children from school does not automatically equate to a hands-on mother.
I do not have family around me to act as a support network, nor am I at liberty to pick up my kids from school due to my working hours. I wake up every morning to make their lunchboxes and drop them off at school. I leave for work with them on my mind, and I have a webcam to watch them remotely from work. To say, “there is no logic or truth in claiming that all mothers are employees” is true, but the author goes on to present a simplified solution of an employed mother who takes a few minutes to pick up her kids from the kindergarten. Kudos to all those who are in close proximity to the school, the home and the office and whose employers allow them to leave work to do so. My humble guess, though, is that very few have such perfect circumstances and that traffic alone at that time serves as a major obstacle to many. What the author is insinuating truly reflects the lack of understanding of mothers' different circumstances.
I love my work. I love my children. I believe that I can strike a balance between both by taking extra precautions with the help that I employ in my house, setting interaction limits with the driver and my children, and placing a webcam in my home. Most importantly, I can teach my children to recognize when they are in potential danger and raise them to be honest and open with me if they detect uncomfortable situations. My precautions are not foolproof, but they are in God's hands.
We live in times of change. Women are entering the workforce in increasing numbers and in higher positions on the totem pole. Yet, the support services offered in terms of daycares and after-school programs remain stagnant and unable to adjust to the pace.
I believe the author could have presented some mothers' lack of involvement in their children's lives in a way that does not group all mothers in two categories: Those who pick up their children from school, and those who do not ... regardless.
— Halla Angawi is a mother of three children aged 7, 5, and 2. She manages international projects aimed at poverty alleviation at a philanthropic foundation in Riyadh. She can be reached at [email protected].
