Yahya Al-Sulami, judge supervising marriage contracts at the Civil Status Court in Jeddah, attributed 40 percent of divorce cases in the Kingdom to parents denying the prospective couple from meeting each other before their marriage. While Islam gives this right to couples, the prevailing social customs do not.

“Meeting within the bonds of religion ensures the stability of a married life. It is perfectly all right for men and women to get to know each other in the presence of elders in the family,” Al-Sulami said.

“I was shocked to discover on my wedding night that my bride was not the beautiful girl my sister had told me about,” Jamil Salem told Arab News recounting his experience. He stressed the need for men and women to meet before their marriage to avoid being disappointed.

He had earlier refused consent to any marriage proposal before being given the opportunity to meet the prospective bride but his parents firmly denied him this right. Although he has not divorced his wife, he is feeling deceived by his mother and sister who had assured him that they had found him a beautiful girl.

Salem is just one of the thousands of victims of the rigid social custom.

Waseem Bakr, another young man also believes that it is important for the couples to meet before they embark on a journey of a life time.

“The religious ban is only against private meetings without the knowledge of the family,” he said, pointing out that there is no restriction on meetings between men and women in dignified surroundings with the family’s approval as this forms the basis of building a strong future life together.

Yusuf Al-Jabri quoted the historical context of the Prophet (peace be upon him) who had ordered one of his companions to take a look at his would-be bride because it was essential for a healthy married life.

Muhammad Rustom also appealed to the parents to permit their sons or daughters to meet their spouses before their marriage as it would give peace of mind and also an acceptance of each other, which is important for a peaceful married life.

Waseem Bahees said that the choice of a spouse is a personal decision and it was not advisable to depend on the opinion of the family. “Each person has his own expectations of what kind of life partner he or she wants,” he underlined.

Abeer Shareef said that it is ridiculous to insist that a woman should not see her husband until the day of the marriage. “There can be no mutual acceptance under compulsion in any marriage and it could lead to discontentment and a broken home,” she stressed.

According to family consultant Nawal Othman, it was important for a couple to meet before marriage because it is the corner stone of a successful marriage as it leads to an ideological and psychological agreement founded on love and affection. Most importantly, it clears the questions in the minds of the couple and rules out a number of problems which might come up later in life.