Especially sitting next to strangers and exchanging cards and discussing how the economic situation is and threatening to meet again but the moment the baggage arrives it’s over.

Dreading the possibility that the stranger might inflight trace back a common friend or relative and then you have really had it because now you have to keep on talking.

A passenger who has half a dozen small packages that intrude onto your space and the passenger says hope you don't mind and of course you no problem, it’s a pleasure except what has pleasure got to do with being uncomfortable.

Like enjoying watching all other flights leave spot on schedule and the sign says boarding, boarding, gate open, last call while yours is the one that says, "indefinite delay."

Being gracious as the crew announces how much they regret the inconvenience caused to you by the flight being seven hours and 25 minutes late and now how they hope you will settle back and enjoy your flight. Like how would they like to hang about outside my office for seven hours cooling heels and then come in for a chat and "enjoy" a cuppa tea.

And talking about tea, isn't it amazing how airline crew can spill scalding hot tea and coffee on you and yet never be able to pour anything beyond a lukewarm cup for you to drink. I have never ever had a cup of really hot tea inflight. Never.

I love plane trips: And carrying dozens of documents and being abs sure that something horrible is going to happen to them and you are going to be stuck in some alien land and no one will ever hear from you again and for some reason you can turn into a blab-bering idiot just thinking about it.

Constantly hunting for that silly little boarding pass stub and never finding it.

Having the person sitting next to you carrying a baby whose nappy needs changing at frequent intervals and whose, mother thinks you are fascinated by all the details of bringing up the little blighter.

Your window seat passenger being the one who must not only braille about in the hand bags but also stand up and attempt to pull out something from the overhead bin with you underneath the protruding suitcase.

Trying to guess what is in the food.

Getting up to go to the toilet and finding all the "occupied" signs light up just then.

Believing that if you place the "do not disturb sign" on your headrest you will not be disturbed...that's a laugh.

Wanting to buy a perfume to please your wife and finding every brand is there except the one you want.

Trying to get some shuteye when the cretin in front of you yanks open the window shade and slams you with a face full of brilliant sunshine and you could kill him.

When some exotic landmark appears on the port side and you are inevitably sitting on the starboard side.

You look under your chair for the lifejacket and it isn't there and you want to ask the airhostess but you don't want to sound like an alarmist so you shut up and worry about ditching in the sea all the way and will your wife remarry.

You finally get into the toilet and the person before you has strewn paper every way and when you come out the person after you thinks it is you and gives you a dirty look.

You try to swipe the salt, pepper, cheese and chocolate and the plastic spoon with the bun and those cute miniature leftover jams and marmalade tubs and you get seen by co-passengers and you want to say, no, no, not for me, for my nieces but instead you turn red and they have this look on their faces which says, 2000 riyals  for a ticket and the guy swipes two riyals worth of sweets and a plastic spoon.

You cannot find your pen to fill in your disembarkation card.

I love plane rides,certainly I do. 

Because your connection has left by the time you land. You know your car will not be there, you just know. Customs asks you to please open your bag, the computer has you in its random selection.