Q. What does Islam say to blood and kidney donation, and organ donation after one’s death?
Ali Memon, Riyadh
A. All such donations are highly commendable and will be, God willing, generously rewarded by Him. If you donate blood to help injured and sick people, you are helping them to recover good health. This is highly commendable. To donate one’s organs for transplant after one’s death is also a charitable act which Islam encourages. To donate a kidney when alive is also worthy of praise, but one must make sure first that no great adverse effect are likely to arise out of such donation.
Wearing black threads
Q. Could you please explain whether wearing black threads around one’s wrist or neck is permissible. Normally, some Qur’anic verses are read and blown on these threads to make them effective.
S. Khan, Makkah
A. This is just another form of a charm or a talisman. All such articles are forbidden to wear. They are described by the Prophet as a form of shirk, which means associating partners with God. As such, they are very strictly forbidden. Indeed, the Prophet has prayed to God not to grant the wishes for which a person wears such articles. So, they are self-defeating as well.
From another point of view, the Qur’an has been revealed so that we treat it as a code of living and implement it in our lives. It is meant neither for enchantment, nor for watch guard duties to protect us against physical harm. The Qur’an will certainly protect us against much more than physical harm if we learn its message and implement it in our lives. It will give us guidance that ensures that we do not go astray. But this requires a proper approach to the Qur’an, which is God’s guidance to mankind.
When a wife is ill-treated
Q. May I put to you the case of a woman who is always insulted and ill-treated by her husband. Although she works hard as a physician and contributes much to the family finances, still her husband demands more. He often says that a woman should give all her salary to her husband. He often laments his misfortune on being connected with his wife. What is she to do, when she practically has no family, as both her parents are dead and her brother and sisters are all married and live in a different country. She has two children.
Abd Al-Saboor, Jubail
A. Islam requires of every man to take good care of those whom God places under his care: his wife and children. The Prophet says that the best people are the ones who are best to their wives. Numerous are the Hadiths that encourage good treatment of one’s wife. Indeed, a Muslim has a clear duty of taking good care of all women in his family, including wife, mother, sister and daughter. One such Hadith says: "Take good care of women. A woman is created from a rib. If you try to straighten a rib, you will break it. A break means divorce. Hence, take good care of women." (Related by Al-Bukhari) Note how the Hadith starts and finishes with the same wording, requiring men to treat women with kindness. The middle of the Hadith highlights a certain quality of women, which tends to create misunderstanding. Hence, the Prophet encourages us to be patient with our women so that family relations are maintained.
In return for such good care, a man stands to earn great reward from God. Needless to say, a person who turns a deaf ear to such Hadiths and instructions exposes himself to God’s displeasure. Not only so, but we must always remember that the Prophet has only taught us what is good for us. If we refuse it, we are substituting for his good teaching something that is much inferior to it.
This man thinks that when he married he obtained for himself a slave whom he could work hard to enrich himself. He thus treats her so badly, even worse than an animal. When people use animals for their purposes, such as a horse, ass, or cow, they take care of such animals because they want them to continue to give them the service they need. They feed their animals well and give them the rest they need. If they are ill, they have them examined; if they are hungry, they feed them; if they are tired, they rest them; and they show them care and often love. Unfortunately, some men treat their wives and families with less care than they would take of their animals. Such men are not worthy of having a family. They are ungrateful for the blessing God has given them in providing them with wives and children.
The lady in this case is offering far too much to a husband who is totally ungrateful. It is not her responsibility to support her husband and children. That is the man’s responsibility. A working woman may do well to contribute to the family finances, particularly if her work means an increase in the level of spending, as in the case of having to employ a child minder or domestic help. Contemporary scholars, like Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, make it clear that if a working woman is sharing in the family expenses, her responsibility does not exceed one-third. If this lady’s husband is demanding to have all her salary, he is more than greedy.
Unfortunately, there are people like that in society. These are men who think that they have a divine privilege and that whatever a woman does for them, she is still short of what she should do. They are ungrateful, selfish and self-centered. When a woman gives in to their initial demands, they want more. They are never satisfied. The only way to deal with these people is to take a firm stand, and show them that they have killed the hen that lays golden eggs. However, before the woman makes such a move, she must look for support, either from her family or friends. She should know where she would go in case her husband does something very serious, such as beating her. But normally, such men are cowards. They fear for the privileges they receive from their wives. If this woman has a separate bank account into which she pays her salary, she may be able to refuse to give her husband any money unless he changes his ways. She should steel herself so that she could stand much resistance on his part, but she must stand firm. When he is in a conciliatory mood, she should be ready with her terms. But if he gets nasty, she should be ready to seek outside help, even if she has to go to the authorities or to court.
Having said that, I stress that she should first make sure of what help she can get. But she should not think herself too weak, because she is not. She has resources which she has not used, and it is time to use them so that she receives the kind treatment every wife deserves. May God help her.
