In an interesting quote from the book “The Blue Zones” by Dan Buettner, a 102-years-old Japanese lady says that it took her a long time to realize that beauty is within, that it comes from not worrying so much about one’s own problems. Her advice is that a good way to look after one’s self is by taking care of others. She also encourages us to be kind to people and to smile more. Well, if she reached her venerable age with such a positive attitude, shouldn’t we believe her words? She doesn’t deny the importance of eating properly, of following an appropriate diet, of exercising and of caring about our health, but she mainly stresses the importance of a positive outlook on life. Isn’t this pure positive thinking? If an elderly, possibly not highly educated person says what many authors, spiritual leaders and preachers keep saying — and she proves it with the way her own life unfolded — shouldn’t we give additional credit to the principles we (you and I) are trying to examine in our “conversations”?
The Japanese lady says that, when she was younger, she used to take great care of her long hair because she considered it an essential part of her attractiveness. This is, of course, totally right. Ladies have to look after their physical appearance, as well as men — if they want to — because looking nice is a natural desire that most human beings have. The problem arises when this desire becomes overwhelming and the individual considers it as the main (if not the only) tool to present themselves to the world in order to receive love and admiration. If they believe this, they are wrong. After having appreciated their beauty at first sight, their true nature, their character and personality are what will make such admiration continue or disappear. If inside the beautiful shell there is no consistency, the admiration will fade away. People like to deal with true, interesting, dedicated human beings rather than with a deceiving façade.
Another point the above mentioned centenarian talks about is worry. Oh, yes! Worry is a real killer. It stems from fear (the origin of all evil) and — if you let it — it can literally destroy your life. When you worry, let’s say, in a normal way, no harm is done. You are preoccupied because tomorrow you have an exam do face or a deadline to meet, but then you overcome it, you do your job and ... it is over! But some people either over worry or never stop worrying. When you over worry, you give too great an importance to something that is not extremely significant. For example, a pimple on a teenager’s forehead can become a real tragedy (so she won’t go to a party she was looking forward to), or it can be just accepted, hidden by some make-up and ... off she goes to the party!
The intensity of worry increases according to age and seriousness of problems, but the principle is the same, i.e. harboring negative feelings of extreme fear about something that, at the moment, you cannot do anything about. Besides, there are those who just cannot stop worrying and who, in so doing, end up ruining their lives and the life of their family. Imagine an individual (I personally knew one, so I know what I am talking about!) who can’t help worry about every little thing that does not go according to plans. Their son is fifteen minutes late in coming back from work? They fret. The pasta was slightly overcooked? They get upset. Someone didn’t return their call? They are in distress. They can’t find their keys? They are in a panic. Such behaviors make them not only a nag, but a real bother for those who live and deal with them on a daily basis. What about you? If you tend to fret… please don’t. Don’t be a worrier. Take life easier and ... smile. Don’t forget to think about others beside yourself. Being generous, available, dedicated can greatly help you to see your problems under a less dramatic light. As a consequence, you will feel less stressed out, you will experience serenity and well being. Finally ... who knows? You might live happily till over a hundred and give others similar advice.
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