Few days back I attended a parents’ meeting at my children’s school. Though it was not the first or second time I attended such a meeting but for a number of reasons, the last meeting brought back lots of memories from my childhood. During meetings with the teachers, they showed me my sons’ work during the term and compared their progress in different key areas during the entire term. They also discussed how they measure students’ progress and what they do if they think a pupil is not progressing in key skills as they anticipate. Throughout all the meetings, there was no mention of other children or how my sons’ rank in their respective classes. After the meetings were over, I couldn’t stop remembering my schooldays. I remember the competitive learning from early years and how we were encouraged to compete with each other and to beat each other for top rankings in the class. I remember how teachers (unintentionally) would praise a kid just because she is talented and would tell us (you need to be like her).
This meeting also reminded me of how I used to feel at the mention of some other student’s good performance and how desperately I wanted to perform like her. We used to be given tons of homework with lots of stuff to memorize. Those who succeeded in memorizing efficiently would stand first or second in the entire class. I have always loathed this competitive learning system, which I believe has become the norm in most Arab countries. I vividly remember a song usually aired at Toyoor Aljannah children channel that really irritated me. It went something like that: I am Deema and I am always the first!
The song reflected the competitive learning system, which is based in comparing a child’s progress with his/her peers. I believe this mindset has affected us. We became participants of a rat race in which we must do better than the rest.
I remember how I was so keen on securing first position in my class and would always feel jealous if someone else clinched that position. I know that education system is changing in Saudi Arabia and its not as rigid as it used to be, but I think comparing ourselves with others in any aspect of life is just silly and in my days being silly was the norm and if you were not silly enough to anticipate being the number one then you were not good enough. I am really glad that my children are not facing the same situation.
@ HatoonKadi
