Although the issue of modesty is preached in religious forums and schools on the theoretical level, it is not encouraged in real life, as it should be. Since childhood we hear the saying “modesty is a branch of faith.” Perhaps a father and his child hear this said a Friday sermon, and the father would instruct his son to listen and learn. But once out in the street, he would blame him for not answering back in reply to a joke at his expense by an elderly neighbor, and say “Why didn’t you answer back! are you are a shy girl? ” Here the father forgets modesty includes respect for our elders and paying back bad deeds with good. This way the father teaches his son audacity in order to be a ‘strong’ man as apposed to modesty and humility .

I often wonder why the qualities of modesty and humility have become narrow and limited in the minds and actions of many men? Yet you find them demanding that women be so modest and humble to the point that their voice in claiming their rights are silenced, otherwise they would be considered unabashedly shameless if they demanded what is in fact permissible for women! These same types of men forget that if they had an once of modesty, it would prevent them from harassing women, one way or the other, just as they demand that women also be modest in her dress, her gait and everything else.

They forget that the men should shy away from violating the rights of divorced women in the custody of their children or feel some shame when women are beaten preventing them from marriage stealing their money or sabotaging their right to medical treatments, education or work. Or when they separate from their wives but never divorce them because the poor women can’t pay back their dowries. They forget that men should be ashamed when they violate the rights of those who are vulnerable, just as want women to be ashamed to demand their rights from those in power. A truly amazing contradiction!

For example, just as a man would get upset and offended when he sees an angry woman, shouting and cursing shamelessly in a public place, he should also feel the same way when he hears another man doing the same thing. Modesty in the form of restraint, is what a man should practice with his family, holding his tongue at home so his children do not hear obscene language spewing from his mouth; is also what should force him to hold his tongue when he is in public.

Modesty and politeness practiced between colleagues and friends should also be your persona when you write behind a pseudonym in social networking sites. No doubt that your sense of propriety, when you hear a personal attack on your female relatives, makes you feel mortified and therefore must force you to respect others and be ashamed of cursing some woman you do not even know on Twitter!

The truth is, anyone not ashamed in front of God’s creation is certainly not ashamed of the Creator. And as modesty, humility and propriety in women are signs of their feminine maturity; they are also evidence of a fully masculine and mature man.